So I was down at my local timeshaft recently… but for a change, that’s not where this update begins.
Word got out about the chronowraith skull – I mean, I wasn’t keeping it secret in any way – and I’ve essentially been quarantined in the lab with it because top scientists and the government are concerned about the risks of messing with something so heavily timewhacked. Without the access to funds and materials to better research it, I’ve only been able to make a little progress. I managed to scrap together a timewhack meter strong enough to not explode like the last one. The readings fluctuate in a pattern that seemed meaningless, until I mapped the coordinates to one axis, and the output of a random number generation code to the other. The fluctuations were always in line with the random numbers, even when I stopped and reset the code, or messed around to skew the probabilities. In life the chronowraith sees all points of time at once. Knowing its skull would end up here, perhaps it somehow observed this string of random numbers, and synchronised its thoughts to it. This opened up more questions than it answered. I kept thinking, “if only I could get out of here and get new parts and my notes and everything…”
And then a stranger, who looked precisely like a stereotypical mad scientist but with a beret, suddenly appeared out of thin air one afternoon. He immediately shouted “Allons y, we don’t have much time! Haha, get it, time? But seriously, I gotta get you out before my Time Flombateur de-flops this flop!”
He grabbed my arm. I suppose the flop must have de-flopped after that, because next thing I knew, I was out of there. In an instant, I went from standing in the lab to flying along a wild glowing blue stream of energy. I saw the professor for a moment. The words “Au Revoir, Barnabus!” reached my ears like a distant yell, and then he was gone. I’m embarrassed to say I did not immediately realise that the flow of energy I was in was my local timeshaft itself. After what felt like a few minutes, but could have been any amount of time, I found myself soaring through the air and landing with a thud on the ground. I came to my senses, and looked around at a familiar site. It was, of course, the very same place I always come to check the timeshaft. Moments later, the very same chronowraith skull flew out, and I instinctively caught it in my hands, as if my subconscious had known to expect it.
I will try to keep you up to date, but I expect I may need to continue my studies quite discretely. I always knew that the underground research base I had constructed years ago would come in handy!
Until next time,
– Barnabus K. Pompadour